Humor

               REDNECKS ARE EVERYWHERE
  
 What's the plural of Ya'all?? All-Ya'all.
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 Did you hear about the South Carolina redneck who
 passed away and left his entire estate in trust  for
 his beloved widow? She can't touch it until she's
 fourteen.
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 What's the difference between a good ol' boy and a
 redneck?
 The good ol' boy raises livestock. The
 redneck gets emotionally involved.
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 What's the most popular pickup line in Alabama?
 "Nice tooth".
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 Emily Sue passed away and Bubba called 911.
 The 911 operator told Bubba she would send someone
 out right away. "Where do you live?" asked the  operator.
 Bubba replied, "At the end of Eucalyptus Drive."
 The operator asked, "Can you spell that for me?"
 There was a long pause and finally Bubba said,
 "How  'bout if I drag her over to Oak Street and you
 pick  her up there?'
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 How do you know when your staying in a Kentucky  hotel?
 When you call the front desk and say, "I've gotta  leak
 in my sink" and the person at the front desk says,
 "go ahead."
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 How can you tell if a Texas redneck is married?
 There is dried chewing tobacco on both sides of
 his  pickup truck.
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 Did you hear that they have raised the minimum
 drinking age in Tennessee to 32?
 It seems they want to keep alcohol out of the schools.
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 What do they call reruns of "Hee Haw" in
 Mississippi?
 A documentary.
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 How many rednecks does it take to eat a 'possum?
 Two. One to eat and one to watch for traffic.
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 Why did God invent Armadillos?
 so Texas rednecks  can
 have 'possum on the half shell.
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 Where was the toothbrush invented? Oklahoma. If
 it  was invented anywhere else it would have been
  called  a teethbrush.
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  Arkansas State Trooper pulls over a pickup truck  on
  I-40. He says to the driver, "Got any ID?"
  The driver says "Bout what?"
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  Did you here about the $3,000,000 Tennessee State
  Lottery? The winner gets $3 a year for a million  years.
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  Why did O. J. Simpson want to move to West  Virginia?
  Everyone has the same DNA.
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  Did you hear that the governor's mansion in Little
  Rock, Arkansas burned down? Pert' near took out
  the  whole trailer park.
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  A new law recently passed in North Carolina:
  When a couple gets divorced, they can still be brother
  and sister.
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   What's the best thing ever to come out of  Arkansas?
  I-40.
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 Two Mississippians are walking down different ends
 of a street toward each other. One is carrying
 a sack. When they meet, the first man asks, "Hey
 Tommy Ray. What'cha got in th' bag?"
 "Jus' some chickens," says Tommy Ray. The first man asks,
 "If I guess how many they are, can I have one?'
 Tommy Ray says, "Shoot, if ya guesses right, I'll
 give you both of them." The first man says, "OK.
 Ummmmmmmm . . . five?"
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 What do a divorce in Alabama, a tornado in Kansas
 and a hurricane in Florida have in common?
 Somebody's fixin' to lose a trailer.
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 A Mississippian came home and found his house on
 fire. He rushed next door, telephoned the fire
 department and shouted, "Hurry over here. My
 house is on fire!"
 
 "OK," replied the fireman, "How do we get there?"
 
 "Shucks, don't you still have them big red  trucks?"
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 Why do folks in Kentucky go to the movie theater  in
 groups of 18 or more?
 Cuz 17 and under not  admitted.
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 What do you have when you have 32 Rednecks in the
 same room?
 A full set of teeth.
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 Why did it take the Louisiana couple 5 days to get
 to the Mississippi line? Everytime they saw a
 sign  that said gas station, clean restrooms..........
 they did.