Valentine Poem

   A Valentine Poem for those Redneck Men

        Kudzu is green;
        My dog?s name is Blue.
        And I?m so lucky
        To have a sweet thang like you.

        Yore hair is like cornsilk
        A-flappin? in the breeze
        Softer than Blue?s
        And without all them fleas.

        Yore as graceful as okry
        Just a-dancin? in the pan.
        Your as fragrant as SunDrop
        Right out of the can.

        You have all yore teeth
        For which I am proud;
        I hold my head high
        When we?re in a crowd.

        Yore as strong as a four-wheeler
        Racin? through the mud,
        Yet fragile as that sanger -
        Ya know - Naomi Judd.

        When you hold me real tight
        Like a padded gunrack,
        My life is complete;
        Ain?t nuthin? I lack.

        Yore complexion?s perfection
        Like the best vinyl sidin?.
        Despite all the years,
        Yore age, it keeps hidin?.

        Me ?n? you?s like a Moon Pie
        With an RC cold drank.
        We go together
        Lack a skunk goes with stank.

        Some men, they buy chocklit
        For a speshul day;
        They git it at Wal-Mart
        It?s romantic that way.

        Some men git roses
        On a speshul day
          From the cooler at Kroger.
        ?That?s impressive.? I say.

        Some men buy fine diamonds
          From a flea market booth.
        ?Diamonds are forever,?
        They explain suave and couth.

        But for this man, honey,
        These will never do.
        For you are too speshul,
        You sweet thang you.

        I got you a gift,
        Without taste or odor.
        Better ?n diamonds,
        It?s a new trolling motor!